What if one's nose color reflected how good or bad a person is, deep down inside? Ever think of that, God? This might be more effective in promoting model behavior than anything that currently exists. Let's face it, you can commit the most heinous crime and no one would know how evil you are unless you got caught. In my new scheme, that person's nose would turn purple the moment he commits the crime.
I humbly propose the following nasal colors for Earth 2.0:
- Average behavior and thoughts - white nose
- More good deeds and kinder thoughts than expected - pink nose
- Mother Theresa or Gandhi type - yellow nose with powder blue stars, clouds or halos
- Basically good-hearted, but a bit opportunistic - orange nose
- Always looking out for your best interests - forest green nose
- Few redeeming qualities - navy blue nose that frequently itches
- No redeeming qualities - purple nose that constantly drips
Obviously, we would lose the merriment of clowns with big red noses. But if you decided that clowns were merely a distraction to the human race, nobody would miss their noses.
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